The singer also detailed a terrifying experience she had during a performance, After Bebe Rexha was hit on the face with a phone during a New York City performance, Kelly Clarkson got candid about how these types of situations impact her mental health.
The “Because of You” singer appeared on The Howard Stern Show to promote her new album Chemistry, during which Howard Stern alerted her about the incident. Understandably, Clarkson was shocked.
The radio show host then asked her if she ever panics about possibly experiencing a similar situation while performing. Her reply? Yes.
She noted that she’s been feeling that fear “especially after what happened with Jason Aldean,” referencing the 2017 mass shooting, which took place at the Route 91 festival.
“I literally looked at Brandon [Blackstock] when I was still married [to him] and [said], ‘I don’t know when I’m gonna go back out,'” she shared. “Because then you start thinking like, ‘I’m gonna risk that and not see my kids again because I was singing onstage?'”
And the Kelly Clarkson Show host even disclosed that she too has had troubling moments onstage.
She recalled, “One time I was singing at this thing and my eyes were closed, so you’re even more vulnerable, and this person on live TV—on this show oversees—rushed to the stage and came up and hugged me, put their arms around me.”
The American Idol alum continued, “When your eyes are closed and you’re singing, you aren’t thinking anything except…I mean, I had like a whole moment that night at the hotel where people were like, ‘Are you okay?’ and I just wasn’t talking and like if I’m not talking, there’s a problem.”
“It was very scary, because at that moment I realized how vulnerable I was. I never thought like that before,” Clarkson added.